Right Thinking From The Left Coast
No legacy is so rich as honesty - William Shakespeare

I Will Buy You A New Life

Anyone who says your life is the most valuable thing you own hasn’t met this guy.

An Australian is hoping to make a fresh start after a failed marriage by putting his entire life up for sale on the auction website eBay.

Ian Usher, 44, has decided to put everything he owns - including his three-bedroom home, car, and job - up for sale to fund his escape from painful memories.

Bids for the “life package” will start at just one Australian dollar, but Mr Usher is hoping to pocket £230,000 from the sale on the internet auction website.

Mr Usher, who emigrated from Scarborough six years ago and became an Australian citizen in 2006, split from his wife Laura last year after five years of marriage.

The split from the woman he calls “the best girl in the world” has left Mr Usher desperate for a new life elsewhere, without the prolonged pain of having to sell off their belongings bit by bit.

He said: “My life here is absolutely fantastic, but I just want to make a clean break and start again literally, so I am selling everything lock, stock and barrel, from the contents of my wardrobe to my kettle, and from my cutlery to my car.

“My aim is to walk away at the end of the eBay auction with my wallet in one pocket and my passport in the other, go to the airport and just jump on the first available plane to anywhere.

“My tale is a bit of a sad one, but I am not trying to sell anyone a sob story.

“I appeciate that many people have had to cope with much more than I have and have had much more sadness in their lives.

“This is just my way of dealing with what has happened to me.”

Yeah, but what if your life really sucked? Could the buyer get a refund or a trade-in? My own life, for example, is fairly boring. You can have it if you want-I’ll take monthly payments.

Posted by West Virginia Rebel on 03/17/08 at 02:47 AM (Discuss this in the forums)

Comments


Posted by HARLEY on 03/17/08 at 04:58 AM from United States

what a fucking pussy.

Posted by Lee on 03/17/08 at 06:08 AM from China

No shit.  What a douchebag.  Man up, Nancy.

Posted by on 03/17/08 at 11:51 AM from United States

I started over again when I was 31, but it was because I was forced to do so.

Just so you know, I’d still like to get some of my stuff back from that bitch....

Posted by Hal_10000 on 03/17/08 at 12:58 PM from United States

I’m reminded of those two ballplayers in the 70’s—Kekich and Patterson, I think—who swapped their whole families.

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